First of all, you need to STOP! Just stop and listen to me for a minute and maybe this will help a little bit. Although I ultimately don't know exactly how you feel or why, I would imagine that you do have a lot on your plate and you're thinking about all the things that need to get done because you want your wedding day to be absolutely perfect.
Since my own personal wedding experience, I have made these discoveries. There are basically 3 types of stressors. Once you can identify which stressor is bothering you, you can tackle it and get rid of it.
- internal stressors
- external stressors
- stressors you cannot control
Sometimes, we are our own worst demons. When I was planning my wedding, I had personal issues that I had to deal with. I tend to worry quite a fair bit, so it didn't surprise me that I would worry that I wouldn't fit into the gown or find the right shoes or that my hair would look like a mess or that I wouldn't be able to sleep the night before the wedding and end up with huge bags under my eyes. I finally realized that I was driving myself crazy worrying about all these things that I could prevent ahead of time, just by preparing myself and taking it one step at a time.
So, I started to eat healthier, but I never starved myself because I love food too much and I needed the energy for all the wedding planning. I ate more veggies and fruits and skipped the occasional bag of chips. But, if I wanted those cookies, I had them and I enjoyed them. I ordered the gown in my actual size, rather than assuming I would lose enough weight to fit into a smaller size. You can always take in a gown but having to make it bigger would be difficult. I also found myself a makeup artist who stayed the entire wedding day for an additional fee.
I also had friends who at times, wondered if they were doing the right thing, not because they didn't love their fiancés, but because they were worried about how getting married would change who they were as individuals and whether they'd be able to fulfill the commitments and responsibilities of being married. So, I'll tell you exactly what I said to them.
You are completely entitled to have your own feelings and doubts and you have to embrace them no matter what they may be because if you try to suppress how you feel, it will only make it worse. At the same time, you have to keep things in perspective. Yes, you are going to get married, but that doesn't mean you'll be changed into a totally different person overnight. You'll still be the same person you've always been: quirky, funny, whatever. Experiences over time will add more layers to who you are and that includes, experiences you will have with your future husband.
And, as for responsibilities, all humans have responsibilities, whether or not they're married. Getting married means taking on a new role which comes with new responsibilities and expectations, not just from your fiancé, but from yourself too. So, you've had responsibilities and expectations before and you know you can handle them. Your fiancé loves you for who you are and you don't have to worry about meeting his expectations or your own. You will both be working at this marriage together and you'll both try to reason and talk things over and if you ever get weighed down, you can always turn to him for support.My suggestion to you: Recognize when internal stressors are bothering you, acknowledge them and tackle each one individually while keeping things in perspective. Remember, you can be your own worst enemy so stop it before it gets out of hand.