We have everything we need. How do we tell our guests we prefer cash?

QuestionWe have lived together for many years and will be getting married. Instead of gifts, because we already have everything we need for starting a home, we would prefer money. How do you respectfully ask for this without offending your guests?

AnswerMany established couples often wonder what the best way is to tell guests about their bridal registry or that they would prefer cash since they already have everything they need.

While it may be tempting, do not to indicate this preference in the wedding invitation. To do so makes the gift seem like an obligation to your guests. If you are having a bridal shower, it can be mentioned in the shower invitation that a monetary gift is preferred. Another great way to let wedding guests know is through your network of close family and friends and the wedding party. When asked, they can simply say, “Jane and Robert already have everything they need since they’ve been together for so long. A monetary gift would be most appreciated.” If you are asked directly, you can say something similar to that. (e.g. “You know us, we already have everything. A monetary gift would be great, thanks!”).

Expect that some guests may still prefer to give a wedding gift of their choice. Accept all wedding gifts graciously since it is still up to the guest to decide what he/she would like to give.